2014年2月19日水曜日

I learnt something today

I learnt something today.

I like learning stuff.

I've learnt lots of stuff about living in snow already.

I've learnt:


  • Snow is slippery- ice is worse. Walk on snow if you only have the choice between the two.



  • Even powder snow will go wet and make you soggy and miserable when it melts. Always, always brush the snow off when you go indoors.



  • Even powder snow, even slushy half thawed snow, even regular snow snow- heck- all snow- will freeze solid to your porch over night. Never put off removing the snow from your porch. Never.



  • Driving on snow and ice sucks. You're gonna slip, you're gonna slide. Your teeth will be rattled out of your head on the weird corrugated wave pattern unshoveled show inevitably freezes into on the roads.  Your wheels will spin, you'll lose traction. You won't be able to turn where you want or how you want. Driving on snow and ice sucks.


And today?

Today I learnt something new about driving in the snow.

Well parking in the snow actually.

See, they shovelled the snow to the edge of the carparks after last week's snow.

So after this week's snow there was nowhere for the snow to go and after they piled it up at the ends of the carparks the parking areas are good for VW Bugs, Morris Minors and anything made by Little Tikes.  Real cars? Big cars? The 7 seater people movers so popular among families? Yeah, not so much.

So, I got to after school care and inched my way between the snow pile sentinels at the entrance to the carpark in a move reminiscent of the dreaded S-bend at driving school. Phew.... I thought that was going to be the hard bit but then I had to try and park far enough back to not block through traffic between me and the people movers parked opposite. No problem! I have big wheels and I've been driving over snow banks all week. I am big car driver- hear me roar!!!

__________????

What happened to the roar?

Not even a murmur??

Our car is a diesel engine. It's not something you'd call quiet.

But now it was silent.

Turned the key and-

__________________

silence.

Aghhhhh????? Ehhhhhhh???? Whaaaaaaa?????

Started freaking out. Cut the engine. Jumped out of the car and looked under it. Nothing.

Looked for steam escaping from the bonnet- nothing.

Walked round the back- uhhhhh....

I had backed WAAYYYYY into the snowbank.

I couldn't even see my rear bumper let alone my exhaust pipe.

I had a feeling that was a kind of bad thing....

I learnt that from a kid who transferred to my high school from juvenile detention- or that was the rumour anyway- he wan't there for long.... who knows where he is now.... we didn't keep in contact for some reason..... but he was at my school long enough to get annoyed with a science teacher and plug his exhaust with mud one day. I remember that and that it was a bad thing for the car, the teacher and the kid.

Pretty sure that snow would be equally bad I decided to dig myself out. Easy- just scoop the snow away, right?

Bugger.

Bloody snow was not nice fluffy snow. It was crunchy, icy packed into rock-solid shape snow. I had no digging utensil bigger than a toothbrush.

Hmmm... I remembered that I had learnt that exhaust pipes are very hot. Learnt that from a girl at Uni whose romantic date riding pillion on her boyfriend's motorbike ended up with a trip to hospital and a really bad burn on her bare calf.

Hot exhaust pipe melts rock-solid icy snow unblocks exhaust.

Damn, I'm smart.

Well, not smart enough to not back into the snowbank in the first place but I did get the car started, re-parked and picked the girls up without anybody noticing my predicament.

And I get to add to my list of things I've learnt.


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