Today was Sport's Day at the local elementary school.
The local elementary school that Meg will go to from next April.
The 6 year old nencho class at each kinder was invited along as an orientation activity.
I've driven passed it hundreds of times.
It's where we hold the Village Sport's Day so I've been there a few times, too.
But I'd never been there when all the students were there.
All the students... some 800 of them...
The place is huge.....
Got home and looked at the pictures and found this one:
All the things I'm nervous about in one picture:
The line of white ants in front of the big white building are students. There's lots of them. That building is the gym. It's huge. All that expanse of earth between me and the gym is the school oval. It's huge. And there's three other play areas.... and two pools.... aghhhhhh! Meg is going to get lost and no-one will find her- she'll probably be in with the goats or the rabbits....
The red hats are the kids from Meg's kinder. (phew. I know those kids...)
The yellow hats are the other kinder in the village (gulp- there's so many of them....)
The motley line of hats on the right are the kids who go to an out of village kinder. (gulp. City kids...)
The woman in black is Meg's teacher, Yuki-sensei. (She's not going with them- ahhhhhhh!!! I don't know if I can say goodbye to Yuki-sensei... Might have to keep turning up at 4pm just for the chats....)
The woman in the blue shirt is one of the elementary school teachers. (gulp-there' so many of them, and I don't know her, and she's leading my Meggie away....)
And then there were all the stares from people who I haven't met yet. I find it hard to believe there's anyone here who doesn't know of me in a 'did you hear there's some loud, crazy, wild-gardening, foreign woman living up in Nagasaki's old house?' kind of way so I guess they were just putting a face to the name but still, I live 95% of my life without the stares and I always forget the feeling until it happens again. Oh well, it won't be long until they get bored of me I guess...
I've spent the last couple of months talking to M about school and hyping it up and focussing on all the fun and it's working. She's really looking forward to it.
But I forgot about me.
And then I saw this picture and there's M walking away from me, indistinguishable from all the hordes of other 6 year olds, leaving her beloved Yuki-sensei and I behind as she walks into the vast unknown... alone...
It's just a picture.
It's not real.
It's just a picture...