You Are a Yellow Crayon

Your world is colored with happy, warm, fun colors.

(Not at the moment, my PIL are staying and my husband is away on business. @_@!!  Angry gashes of red interspersed with guilty smudges of grey best describe me at the mo.)

You have a thoughtful and wise way about you.

(Why thank you. You seem quite the dandy yourself.)

 Some people might even consider you a genius.

(Yes, my husband when I get the girls to sleep after he's hyped them up and declared the situation hopeless, but that's really just commonsense and experience.  My daughters when I know the words to a Japanese song in English but again not really genius level if you're out of preschool...)

Charming and eloquent, you are able to get people to do things your way.

(I WISH!!!!! or does 'people' not include wilful children and stubborn FILs??)

While you seem spontaneous and free wheeling, you are calculating to the extreme.

(Ok, you got me there.  I am currently too busy 'prepping classes' to watch too loud baseball in the overheated and crammed full of luggage front room with the PIL. A barefaced lie but necessary for my mental health and FILs physical wellbeing!)

Your color wheel opposite is purple. You both are charismatic leaders, but purple people act like you have no depth.

(No depth?  Honey I got height, width AND depth to spare!!)

And to assuage my guilt at slagging of my PIL where they'll never see it here's a picture from today:

MIL making those infuriating thousand part paper whatsymacallits from kids magazines, the girls painting with their toothbrushes right in front of her (?????) and FIL assembling furniture I didn't ask for and don't want, need or like.  Oops slipping back into slagging again. ;P  It was nice of him to assemble it for us though, wasn't it? 

Edit: WTF???? I just walked into my kitchen to have FIL wave his hands around in a big old X at me: 'Don't come in here, I'm smoking.'  Like hell!  I put up with you removing plants from my garden to take home WITHOUT ASKING, I grit my teeth through you using that REALLY LOUD AND SLOW VOICE at me when I am neither hearing impaired nor mentally challenged, I paint my smile on when we have to plan our day around your naptime and the baseball fixture, and I bite my tongue when you tell my children they are too noisy/ too quiet, indecipherable in Japanese because speaking English is stunting their brain development rah rah rah but the one hard and fast rule around here is DON'T SMOKE IN MY FREAKING HOUSE!!!!!  Its MY house.  I have a daughter with allergies but more than that I hate the smell of it and it's MY HOUSE- MY RULES.  

I am so disappointed.  I have a lot of trust issues with FIL but this trip had been going well.  I was going to go and have my bath and go up to bed and leave him down here blasting the neighborhood with some detective show.  But now? damn it, the stakeout continues. >:(

12 件のコメント:

illahee さんのコメント...

oh man!! i would be screaming! thank goodness my FIL doesn't smoke.

and the furniture thing? totally hear you!

you need some hugs!

Midori さんのコメント...

Yikes!!! PIL visits suck. The smoking thing would piss me off big style as well.

Gina さんのコメント...

I hope you survive the visit from your PIL's.

And I agree about the smoke. We have the same house rule, no smoking in our house. If you wanna smoke, take it outside. I totally understand. : ) : )

Gina さんのコメント...

PS, just took the test and guess what...I am indeed a yellow crayon too, LOL!!!!! How funny! : )

tj-injapan さんのコメント...

I enjoy reading your posts, but never get around to commenting (sorry) but this one had me roflmao. I love how you write!

Sorry to hear you had a bad PIL night - I hear you about the DH leaving you alone with them, how rude! And the smoking in your house business, that is just wrong!

I think you need to focus not on what COLOUR crayon you are, but whether or not you can sharpen that crayon enough to gouge out the eyes of your PIL or not? lol.

Hope today is better (or that they are gone!)

Gina さんのコメント...

Sorry just had to say, TJ in Japan just caused me to spew my coffee with this one....

"I think you need to focus not on what COLOUR crayon you are, but whether or not you can sharpen that crayon enough to gouge out the eyes of your PIL or not? lol."

I'm dying here....so funny! Small tears came out the corners of my eyes... ladies! : )

Kim さんのコメント...

Oh, Heather, I have nothing to say, except that I hope today is better!

Well, Jun would say alalalalalalala! And mean it from her heart!

Coffeegrl さんのコメント...

It's so nice to hear from others that think in-laws can be a challenge! I'm really sorry about the smoking in the house thing. I'd like to believe that the "my house my rules" would apply if we had our own place here. Luckily my in-laws don't smoke. Doesn't mean it's any easier learning to live with them. My own dad may not be the most self-sufficient and enlightened guy in the world, but at least he helps out in the kitchen once in a while. FIL = never. Everyone else including my husband must fetch things for him. FIL is lucky he hasn't asked me to get him anything yet - esp. while I've got my hands full with an infant. argh. I hear you!

Nay さんのコメント...

oh, my I would be so annoyed!! I have the same rule in my house - nobody is to smoke inside (that includes our little verandah off the main bedroom!) and if somebody went ahead and smoked knowing the rules, I would be so fuming!! Hugs to you... PIL visits suck! I'm glad that mine don't come here very often at all!!

PS - like Gina and yourself, I'm a yellow crayon too.... lol!

Lulu さんのコメント...

OMG- This cracked me up although I understand how frustrating it would be.

Luckily my PIL have never visited us before and I am quite lucky, while MIL frustrates me sometimes I know it is because she thinks she is doing what is best for her son (and in some cases me)

I do know however that MIL & I have very different views on raising children which is going to make for an interesting time once kids come into the picture.

Off to see what colour crayon I am- I would like to be poo brown as it is the crayon least likely to be used up!

Lulu さんのコメント...

I am a red crayon and my colour wheel opposite is green- apparently green crayons don`t get me...

I must be too complex for the green crayon...


thefukases さんのコメント...

Thanks you guys you're all wonderful. :)

Illahee- I knew you would totally get the furniture thing. You know what- he wants to give me a mirror, too. @_@

Midori- yeah, I think I'll move to London before the next one. Got any spare floor space? ;)

Gina- thank you. I really don't think it's too unreasonable is it? And even our crayons match? This is getting freaky doppelganger buddy!

tj in japan- thanks. I don't know about a sharp crayon- wouldn't a blunt one hurt more in the end? ;P And yes, today was very much better and yes they're gone. coincidence? I think not!

Kim (and jun) thank you. Kid singing really makes me feel better, lucky as Amy's life is a musical. :)

coffegrl- you have amazing psychic powers- this morning as I was making green tea and coffee and DHs bento and trying to convince Amy I was too busy to play hide and seek right that very moment as she hung off my leg FIL pipes up from his seat where he's gumming down on some breakfast I have just made him and says 'HEATHER! Could you peel me a persimmon?' I couldn't even speak I just said 'EH???' and sneered at him rather unpleasantly. I think he got the message and shock horror he can actually peal his own fruit. ;P

Nay- hey fellow yellow crayon! I was fuming but I had to do it silently. I really don't ever want to spoil my kids relationship with their grandparents. I am so proud of my self control!!

Lulu- Yeah MILs can be frustrating too. I butt heads with mine but we have reached an understanding. A kind of detente. While WHAT she does drives me crazy I respect WHY she does it. She loves her family and would do anything for us. Even spending gazillions of yen on shipping us her unwanted furniture! My FIL is just a dinosaur. His problem i made not born. His whole family supports his spoilt child antics with a 'he's old and set in his ways, it can't be helped' attitude. DH tells me people his age can't be expected to peel their own fruit or make their own tea as they have never done it before. Unfortunately for FIL I'm not a perfect DIL and I don't do the house slave thing!